When the Journey Pursues You
If I had had a dollar for every time I heard, “Why hasn’t someone snatched you up yet?” or “Why are you still single? You are such a great catch!” – I would be rich! Seriously – rich!!! If you would have told me at 18 that I wouldn’t get married until I was 35, I wouldn’t have believed you. BUT- that was exactly how my journey went.
It all started with my old junior high youth pastors. They approached me when I was home in Michigan for Christmas, and told me they had this guy they wanted me to meet. I told them no, I wasn’t really interested. (We women can be so funny sometimes – of course I wanted to meet someone!!) But, I honestly had been set up enough times that did not work out, that I was disinterested in the whole dating process all together. Jump forward 1 yr., Christmas again, and they were still asking me to meet this really nice guy they knew. I acquiesced, we got really bad pizza, and the pursuit began.
I think Clark knew waaaay before I did, that this was the real thing. It took me longer, a lot longer. But he never quit pursuing me!!! He would send me care packages in the mail. I remember the first one he sent. He mailed me a “Friday night survival kit”. He listened to me, and would remember the little things about who I am and what I liked, and encourage me in those areas when I would forget. He would also write me letters. I remember getting one, sitting on the couch and just crying, because what he wrote so broke through the walls I had put up in my heart. This guy knew God and knew how to pursue me. He wasn’t the typically guy I had gone after. Note the words, “gone after”. There’s a different between pursuing something, and being pursued.
When this all started for me, I was in a place of uncertainty, but I came through it to a place of great peace and a deep knowing that the God who created me, had put someone into my life who loved me, just the way I was and was kind and gentle with me. It was a beautiful start to a whole new season of my journey in life. To those of you who are still single, and maybe single later in life than you expected – don’t lose heart!! I know now what my friends who had gotten married before me meant when they said enjoy being single!! There is a truth in that statement. There are sooooooo many things, life experiences, trips, and opportunities that I got to do while I was single—things that I just wouldn’t have been able to experience had I gotten married earlier in life.
I also think you learn more about who you really are, what your likes/dislikes are, what you really want in a relationship/marriage, and what your strengths/weaknesses are when you are single. I know it’s not immediately something you can see, but, the truth is, the more you know about who you are and WHOSE you are, the better your relationship/marriage will be when you get there.
I want to leave you with this – ENJOY this season!!! If there is one thing I can say, I believe it is that I will never look back at a season and feel like I cheated it. Oh sure, there were most definitely days I wanted to move on to the next one and be done with it. But, there is always something in that particular season you won’t get in the next one. So find the gold, that treasure in the season you are in, and hang on to it! Enjoy it, share it with those around you, and don’t despise it because there is a season for everything in life. All the treasures you find and gather in that season are things of value you bring with you to a relationship when you do find “the one.”
Leah, and her husband, Clark, are the Program Directors at the DC site for CapCity Church. She is currently at stay-at-home Mom to Joshua, who is 3 months old and has Down Syndrome. Prior to her current job, she worked full time on Capitol Hill for nine years as a Scheduler and Executive Assistant for two Michigan Members. Her favorite things are spending time with family and friends, reading, coffee (because as a parent of an infant, who isn’t!!) and these days, date nights 🙂